2008 Woodie Awards
Gold Strike @ Edgar Mine
By Adam Freeland
9/10/07 - Fool's Gold
"There are gold in them hills!" yelled a crazy 90-year-old miner. There has been a massive Gold strike at the CSM owned and operated Edgar Experimental Mine. A CSM Student doing research on, "How hard rocks really are" discovered this new vein of gold over the summer.
Patton W. Graham, the one accredited with the discovery, was mining in an iron rich environment in the Army Adit when he struck "pay dirt." At first, the Mining Department was upset Graham had deviated from his duties as Mine Sweeper, but when the vein size was discovered, they extended to him a full scholarship for making such a grandiose discovery.
As though it were a gold rush, the mining department immediately began planning the mine expansion, "Coast Guard Raise." The estimated $327 million strike will be used to buy Dean Sinclair a French Riviera vacation home, complete Bob Francisco's severance package, and pay all student fees for an estimated 4 years.
Unfortunately, like Columbus discovering a sea route to India, the truth finally set in. After a microscopic glance at the material, it was found to be Fool's Gold and there had been no gold strike in the retired silver mine.
Graham's inability to distinguish gold from Fool's Gold ended up costing the Mining department $4.2 million in research and planning in a quick two days. The Mining Department student fee will still be in effect, and in fact, raise to over $18,000 per student per semester.
Patton W. Graham, the one accredited with the discovery, was mining in an iron rich environment in the Army Adit when he struck "pay dirt." At first, the Mining Department was upset Graham had deviated from his duties as Mine Sweeper, but when the vein size was discovered, they extended to him a full scholarship for making such a grandiose discovery.
As though it were a gold rush, the mining department immediately began planning the mine expansion, "Coast Guard Raise." The estimated $327 million strike will be used to buy Dean Sinclair a French Riviera vacation home, complete Bob Francisco's severance package, and pay all student fees for an estimated 4 years.
Unfortunately, like Columbus discovering a sea route to India, the truth finally set in. After a microscopic glance at the material, it was found to be Fool's Gold and there had been no gold strike in the retired silver mine.
Graham's inability to distinguish gold from Fool's Gold ended up costing the Mining department $4.2 million in research and planning in a quick two days. The Mining Department student fee will still be in effect, and in fact, raise to over $18,000 per student per semester.
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